Well, I faced it again. 17th June wasn't baby boy3's birthday and I made it through. No toddler joyfully screaming, running amok, smearing cake everywhere, overtired and spoiled by their family and friends. No midnight wake ups or relief at sleeping through. No teething drool, no funny ways of saying new words. No adjustments to … Continue reading Not a birthday
I already shared some pictures of my RED January efforts. Its the first time that I've participated in an effort like that, I did some last year but not officially and didn't run every day. I quite wanted to look back and reflect on how I coped, what I learned and plan what I'm going … Continue reading RED January Review
Today is the second anniversary of baby boy3 being born. I'm finding things harder this year. With all the busy-ness and stress of working and home learning and me doing RED January, I've barely had a moment to pause and take stock. I'm not in a place where I have much that I can put … Continue reading Boy3’s Second Anniversary
It's Baby Loss Awareness Week. On Thursday 15th October 2020, it's a special day to remember our babies we didn't get to keep and raise awareness. I'll either be taking the day off social media or muting some topics. It's vitally important that we raise awareness of baby and infant loss and miscarriage. Families that … Continue reading Baby Loss Awareness Week 2020
Wow! A year ago today I clicked go on WordPress and Twitter and created my first blog site and anonymous account. Thinking back to my first post, I didn't have the least idea what I was doing (not that I do now). I just started writing as though I was chatting to a friend. The … Continue reading First blogiversary
This is a little diary of our third week in social isolation, home learning, and with me working from home and himself on "holiday" this week. See what happened in week 2. Monday I was up bright and early and at my desk before the kids were up. It was himself's actual birthday so he … Continue reading Staying in, staying safe – week 3
Last June my lovely friends bought me a small cherry tree, at around the time that boy3 was due to be born. I don't know what word to use for it, it's not a memorial or a reminder or a memento. I talked about it a bit in C Day. At the time it made … Continue reading Coming back to myself
Dear little man. I'm so sorry you aren't here, it's your first birthday today. I've been dreading today for months, but maybe it doesn't need to be horrid. Maybe we can think of the wonderful family you have, that you'll always be part of. We didn't get to hold you or love you or bring … Continue reading Dear Baby Boy3
2019 has been a rollercoaster. So we're not making big plans for 2020. Its been a big year, we started off expecting a surprise third baby - buying maternity clothes in the sales and planning a new car big enough for three seats. By the end of January that was all over, disastrous and heartbreaking. … Continue reading Here comes 2020
On 31st January 2019 our third son was born sleeping at almost 20 weeks gestation. Those are the hard facts, cold and unemotional. The three days before were spent in hospital desperately hoping that the next option offered by a wonderful team of doctors and midwives would be the one to keep him inside and … Continue reading Recovery after loss
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