@AndSmelly
Yesterday (31 January 2023) marked four years since baby boy3 made an unexpected and far too early exit from my body. I'm not someone who dwells or wallows in the grief I feel for his loss. I acknowledge it, I'm honest about it with myself and with others. I don't shy away from talking about… Continue reading Fog of Grief
It was Baby Loss Awareness Week last week. I almost managed to avoid it altogether. Last year I wrote about what coping looks like, the year before I discussed our loss. Before that I looked at different ways we react to loss. But personally and in my real life, I don't engage in BLAW. I've… Continue reading No more babies
Here we are again, June 17th. This was the date in 2019 that boy3 was scheduled to be born by caesarean section. So even though it's four and a half months after his actual birthday, today remains an unforgettable date for us. We've just made it through another holiday where we seemed to be surrounded… Continue reading Another year passed
The piece was written for and first published at T.B.C, as part of a series of first time descriptions. The world around us freezes every winter, the ground hardens and is inhospitable for months. Nature is harsh, the winds blow and rain, hail and snow swamp the ground. The earth endures the pain and hardship… Continue reading There’s only one first time
Yesterday was my gran's funeral. I don't want to say anything particular about losing her, but I wanted to share the reading I did during the service. God's Garden (by Katie Evans) God looked around his garden, and he found an empty place. He then looked down upon this earth, and saw your tired face.… Continue reading Saying goodbye
Today is the second anniversary of baby boy3 being born. I'm finding things harder this year. With all the busy-ness and stress of working and home learning and me doing RED January, I've barely had a moment to pause and take stock. I'm not in a place where I have much that I can put… Continue reading Boy3’s Second Anniversary
Smelly Socks and Garden Peas 