Yesterday (31 January 2023) marked four years since baby boy3 made an unexpected and far too early exit from my body. I'm not someone who dwells or wallows in the grief I feel for his loss. I acknowledge it, I'm honest about it with myself and with others. I don't shy away from talking about… Continue reading Fog of Grief
Here we are again, June 17th. This was the date in 2019 that boy3 was scheduled to be born by caesarean section. So even though it's four and a half months after his actual birthday, today remains an unforgettable date for us. We've just made it through another holiday where we seemed to be surrounded… Continue reading Another year passed
Molly is one of my absolute favourite bloggers. Her blog is Lovely Local Indie, with a focus on food, days out and places to stay in and around Derbyshire, UK. She's quite local to me so there's always something for me to store away for use one day. The boys are particularly excited to visit… Continue reading Lessons in Loss 18: Miscarriage (Three Years On)
Well RED January is over again. Last year was the first time that I participated in an effort like that, I did some in 2020 but not officially and didn't run every day. I quite wanted to look back and reflect on how I coped and what I achieved. My efforts DateDistanceTimeNotes1 Jan 20226.21km36m 12sShorts… Continue reading RED January 2022 Review
Trigger warning: miscarriage I feel like I'm treading water in my grief. I know we don't always have to be moving forwards, that backwards is OK too. Maybe it's not even like I'm treading water because that's an active attempt to keep afloat. I'm rather effortlessly and aimlessly drifting. I don't know where I am… Continue reading Waves of grief
I'll be honest, not much has changed for me in terms of my reaction to Baby Loss Awareness week since last year. I'm not going to be active on Twitter or Facebook or Instagram talking about miscarriage and baby loss. All I want to say on social media is that I don't want to.... https://www.facebook.com/andsmellysocks/posts/406351987805420… Continue reading BLAW: What does coping look like?
I can't even figure out what to call this post, I'll come back to it. [I came back to it and titled it with my final thought.] So I started my blog a bit over two years ago, to have an outlet for my thoughts and feelings that I'm not comfortable sharing in real life.… Continue reading Any advice for entering a new phase?
Well, I faced it again. 17th June wasn't baby boy3's birthday and I made it through. No toddler joyfully screaming, running amok, smearing cake everywhere, overtired and spoiled by their family and friends. No midnight wake ups or relief at sleeping through. No teething drool, no funny ways of saying new words. No adjustments to… Continue reading Not a birthday
I already shared some pictures of my RED January efforts. Its the first time that I've participated in an effort like that, I did some last year but not officially and didn't run every day. I quite wanted to look back and reflect on how I coped, what I learned and plan what I'm going… Continue reading RED January Review
Today is the second anniversary of baby boy3 being born. I'm finding things harder this year. With all the busy-ness and stress of working and home learning and me doing RED January, I've barely had a moment to pause and take stock. I'm not in a place where I have much that I can put… Continue reading Boy3’s Second Anniversary