We’ve had a lovely time away in Berlin for our tenth wedding anniversary. But staying in a hotel for the second time in two weeks has enforced the things that annoy me about hotels.
1) Lights
They’re crazy. There are a million light switches that seem to have over-lapping, toggley, and unpredictable functions. Can you not just have one for each light and a toggle for everything?
I turned all the lights on when I just wanted the toilet light several times. Himself was unimpressed at 3am.
2) Tissues
Why are there either no tissues anywhere or only in the bathroom?
If I want to blow my nose in the night, I don’t want to have to get out of bed to do so (especially when navigating to the bathroom risks illuminating the entire room).
3) Feathers
I swear I don’t know who uses feather pillows and duvets any more. They’re totally useless. The feathers squish in the pillows causing terrible snoring from himself. They work their way to the bottom of the duvet leaving you with cold shoulders.
Please, normal bedding!
4) Air con or heating
This is similar to light switches. The systems never make sense and often don’t work. Last week, no matter how low I set the thermostat (minimum was 15°C) it wouldn’t cool down. This week, no temperature control, just higher by 1-3 bars or lower by 1-3 bars. No indication what any of that meant.
5) Kettle and milk
Right, I know I like my coffee milkier than most people but really two tiny pots of UHT is never enough. I need at least 4 for one cup.
This weekend the hotel topped that though – no kettle at all! A fancy pod machine (hmmm environmental considerations?) that wouldn’t make hot water and no decaf pods.
Eventually himself hacked it with a hot chocolate pod that he ran three cups of water through and I had my trusty box of emergency travel decaf sachets so all was not lost. A kettle would have been much easier though.
6) Inexplicable shower controls
Sensing a theme here? The shower was nowhere near as confusing as the lights but there were far too many knobs and twisty things which didn’t seem to do the same thing twice.
The end
End of rant, it was a lovely anniversary trip really.
Smelly Socks and Garden Peas 